photo credit: Yvonne L Sweden via photopin cc
Ok, internet. I am going to share too much and ask for your feedback. Which can’t go badly, right?
So as a slightly neurotic type-A individual trying to get pregnant, the question of whether or not to use a thermometer has been weighing on me. I have read Taking Control of Your Fertility, and wow, does she talk you into basal body temperature readings as a way of understanding what’s going on with your cycle. It’s not mysterious: there’s charts! You can draw lines! Look at all those magical stories of people who just started charting and understood themselves better!
But being a slightly neurotic person, going into this process I am trying to make choices that lead to health and flourishing and not feeding the anxiety. And for me in particular, when I get stressed, it comes out in sleeping poorly. Ever since I have been a kid, at times of high stress or who knows what, I won’t be able to fall asleep or I’ll wake up in the middle of the night wide awake with concerns.
I’ve gotten better at dealing with occasional sleeplessness, often by keeping myself from panicking. It’s the middle of the night and you are the only one awake, and rather than say “I’m doomed! I have so much to do tomorrow and my whole day will be ruined! It is dark and lonely and I am the only one up! Ahhh!” I have gotten better at saying to myself “It’s ok, self. The night isn’t scary. Let’s go get a glass of water, and read or watch something light and fluffy on the couch, and if you fall asleep that’s ok, and if not that’s ok too.”
All of this is to say that for me sleep is highly reactive to stress in my life.
So it seems like a really bad idea to start something potentially stressful that depends on how much and how good of sleep I have had. If there was another way to do it, it would be a more serious consideration, but I would hate to add “And my temperature will be off in the morning!” to my list of crazy middle of the night thoughts.
Which brings me to today. I am now on cycle four off of birth control and I have no idea what is happening. I have had wonky spotting each cycle so far. Before going on birth control, six years ago, I had regular normal periods. Since going off I have few days of spotting in the middle, a few days to a week of spotting before anything I would call a period, all-in-all weirdness. I went to the ObGyn in cycle two, after about two weeks of spotting off and on, and her response was “well, at some point you will ovulate, and then things will kick in.” I would say she was right, except there seems to be a method to the madness, I have started spotting consistently on day 24 of the last two cycles, which coincides with lots of PMS-y symptoms. Which makes me think that it’s not completely random?
So in the absence of actual information, I have been naming random spotting: like I call these two days of spotting “ovulation!” or trying to come up with why a few days to week of spotting before something period-like is possible. I think actual information would be helpful, or at least give me more of a sense of what this is or isn’t. I know after hormonal birth control, a body can be odd… and yes, I know at some point another trip to the ObGyn is in order, but I would love to have a better sense what is going on. If this is just “now I spot in the LP,” that’s a different thing then “you haven’t ovulated”–right?
Which brings me back to trying to decide about charting temperatures. Hmm.
So internet–what has been your experience of temping? Any anxiety-prone tempers out there?
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I temped for about six or seven months. It was highly informative because it seemed to correlate with all the other ovulation signs I was seeing and with OPKs. But after a while, it made me pretty anxious. Every high and low during the two-week wait? Oh, the hope and the disappointment. I stopped since I have very regular cycles and use OPKs. One of my first posts on my TTC blog was about throwing away the thermometer. It trigged too much anxiety for me.
Your day 24 spotting doesn’t sound random, but knowing when you ovulate can let you know what your LP actually is. Temperatures are also the best way to know when you ovulated. I would advise temping for a time to get to know your body’s rhythms. But if it gets to be too anxiety-inducing, I’d stop once you see a pattern develop.
Thanks for the feedback TTCwriter. It’s helpful to hear both that it was helpful and that you found it anxiety-producing.
I just started vaginal temping last month because of my stress and sleep induced crazy temps. They are much more reliable whether or not I get enough sleep or am stressed as long as I so at the same time each morning.
That’s helpful to know, thanks ladylove!
She DOES talk you into basal body temperature! My short answer is, in this case, I feel like you could benefit from temping, if only because then you’d actually SEE if you were ovulating or not.
I totally understand the insomnia and resultant anxiety – I’m the same way. I think it’s all about the way you approach it. Don’t look at temping as something to be dreaded or unfortunate. Look at is as a new tool that could shed light on your cycles, a tool that ultimately will give you information (good or bad) about yourself, and in that respect, it’s a win-win. Nothing to stress about at all!
Give yourself a practice month to see what works best for you, and just always mark down if you were up late, or didn’t sleep at all. Take the pressure off by embracing the fact that the first month isn’t going to be perfect – it’s just an experiment to see if it works for you. It’s nothing you have to continue doing forever.
PLUS!!! You’re not necessarily trying to figure out WHEN you’ve ovulated – you’re trying to figure out IF you’ve ovulated AT ALL. Which is SO much easier, because you just need to look at the general trend. If all your temps stay low, even if you have 10 days out of the month that you can’t reliably count, it’s probably a safe bet you aren’t ovulating.
I started temping and made it about five or six days, and then basically said “F it, I’ll do it in six months if I’m not pregnant by then,” because my husband wakes up about forty minutes before I need to, and by the time I’d taken my temperature and jotted it down, I was wide awake and no longer able to enjoy the blissful 40-60 extra minutes of sleep I normally get! And I do so love my sleep, dammit.
True! I’m just looking for big picture trends. And after all, if I get started with it and decide it isn’t for me, there’s no reason to keep going. Purchasing a basal thermometer is not the end of the choice-making…. hmmm…
I did temp for about six months, and now i have a good sense of where my normal temperature range is when I wake up, no matter how much sleep I’ve had. If I’m above 97.9 for at least three consecutive days, I’ve ovulated. I don’t temp every morning but around the time I think I ovulate, I check it every two days or so. If you’re going to do it, do it consistently for a few months and you’ll get a sense of your “normal” range. Are you looking at cervical fluid too? It helps to have more than one thing to look for. Good luck!
I found this blog from tcoyf’s forums and I love it! I am in the exact same boat about temping (although I see from scrolling up that you are pregnant so things obviously worked out for you–congrats!)! My cycles are getting more and more irregular each month I’m off bc, and so temping might give me some more info. But I am VERY prone to stress (in fact, in preparation for pregnancy, I tapered off my anti-anxiety meds so I’m doing everything I can do avoid stress). And I also have irregular sleep patterns (I’m a night owl living in a morning person world). So, I did temp for a month or so but my temps were too irregular to mean anything. So I gave up. But now that I’m on CD 47 with no period in sight, I’m wondering if I should be temping. Ah! This whole thing is horrible.
Hi Jen, ugh sorry about the mysterious cycle! (and CD47 yuck). I think it can be hard to find a system of checking in with your body that helps you feel more centered and not less. I hope you find what is the best fit for you.