The question of when to tell family about our pregnancy was one we struggled with. Unlike friends who could offer support in case of a miscarriage, we knew our families would immediately be emotionally invested and would feel a loss from miscarriage more intimately than our friends. But, waiting until the end of the first trimester felt like too long, especially with a visit from my in-laws on the horizon. We decided we’d tell once we passed past the eight week mark.

And we almost made it! My husband’s mom called last Thursday, and since those two don’t talk regularly, I waved at him, made a ridiculous pregnant belly gesture, and mouthed “baby?” So, that was when we started telling our parents and siblings. I’m really glad that we did because in the midst of a really difficult week ¬†symptom-wise, it was the boost of love, excitement, and support that I needed. It’s given me permission to feel excited in the midst of the unknown.

My oldest brother, a real “tough guy,” nearly broke down in tears when I told him. My other brother, an anesthesiologist, wanted to know all about the birthing center and how I was feeling. But most special has been the reconnection I’ve felt with my mom. She and I were close when I was younger, but as I’ve grown up, we’ve drifted a bit. In some ways, I dreaded telling her about the pregnancy and her impending freak out. And did she ever freak out…but in the best kind of way. I’ve found more than I ever thought that the person I want to talk to most about my pregnancy is my mother.

I feel grateful for their perfect reactions, love, and excitement about our growing family. It’s helping me move into that space of feeling more gratitude and less fear.

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